Mind-blowing Gold products

GOLD CHOCOLATE
This, according to the sales text, is six fingers of chocolate covered in "edible gold." In other words, it's basically six candy bars covered in gold flakes.





GOLD CIGARS
A real, burnable gold leaf wrapped around a cigar. No, it's not even a Cuban, it's a Dominican.





GOLD LOLLIPOP





GOLD VODKA
It's vodka that has gold flakes floating in it, making it just as classy and stylish as everybody's favorite throatburner, Goldschlager.





THE GOLDEN OPULENCE SUNDAE
If you work out what this costs in terms of actual ice cream, it's $200 a scoop for a five-scoop sundae. And you only get vanilla. On the other hand, you also get the world's most expensive chocolate sauce, "exotic candied fruits", and, for no explicable reason, truffles, because nothing says "dessert" like mushrooms. You also get "dessert caviar", which just sounds incredibly gross, and it's served in a crystal goblet with a gold spoon.





THE FROZEN HAUTE CHOCOLATE






This one we'll actually give some credit to; while this bagel, with its white truffle cream cheese and gold leaf all over the top, is the most ridiculous thing we've ever seen done to a bagel, at least the profits from this went towards culinary school scholarships for the needy.